Illuminati Site Breaking News

Illuminati Site Breaking Medical News: We have a cure for Affluenza

It’s my honor to announce this medical breakthrough. We have found the cure for Affluenza. This hereditary disease has been increasing in prevalence. Signs and symptoms include narcissism, nepotism, cronyism, selfishness, greed, amoral behavior and psychopathic tendencies. In 2013 affluenza caused the death of 4 people in Texas, while the patient who inherited the disease is still alive today. This plague is not just a 1st world problem, it’s everywhere.

Clinical trials on humans will be starting soon. Treatment requires the system to be Rebooted, followed by a large injection of Meritocracy. Onset of the treatment shocks the system and only 1% of the population will have side effects. The vaccine is currently in production around the globe and will be shipped to local Illuminati chapters for distribution to the general public. Please stay tuned for more Illuminati Site Breaking News.

Illuminate your friends